give up

Jessica Mullen

give up

Jessica Mullen
yes i am so crabby. yes i am so irritable. yes i am groggy and tired and disappointed in myself. yes i am feeling sick. yes i am mad at myself. yes i am frustrated. yes i am disgusted. yes i am in a bad mood and i am resisting being in a bad mood. yes i am resisting the way i feel. yes i want to feel differently. yes i am frustrated. yes i am disappointed. yes i am sad. yes i am blocking my blessings!!!!

yes i just want to feel better. yes i am frustrated. yes i am disgusted. yes i am desperate for this chapter to end. yes i am not present. yes i am not present. yes i am now present. i am. am i aware? am i aware?

yes i am aware. i have looked to experience for satisfaction for too long.

yes i am sad. yes i want to cry. yes i want attention. yes i am disappointed. yes i am frustrated. yes i am annoyed. yes i am sad. yes i am frustrated. yes i am furious. yes i am mad. yes i am mad. yes i am mad. yes i am mad. yes i am resisting. yes i am sad. yes i am sad. yes i am wanting more. yes i just want to feel better. yes i just want to feel better. yes i am so mad at myself. yes i am so sad. yes i am mad at myself for eating my feelings. yes i am mad at myself for having these feelings. yes i am mad at myself for trying and caring. yes i am mad at myself for getting too mixed with experience.

yes i just want to go to bed. yes i just want to forget. yes i just want to close my eyes and be aware of nothing. yes i am frustrated about my fucking behaviors.

yes i am soooo fuckingggg annnoyeeddddd. yes i am disappointed. yes i am sad. yes i am furious. yes i am sad. yes i am mad. yes i am sickened. yes i am pisssssssed.

thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you god for replacing me with you.

THANK YOU. thank you. thank you. thank you. please help me get there. thank you for the better mood. thank you for stabilizing as i am. thank you for helping me be at peace with what is. thank you for helping me stay sober today. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for the perfect timing.

thank you for the magick life. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for the perfect timing. GOD I AM SO MAD. thank you for helping me. thank you for helping me. thank you for helping me. thank you for helping me stop resisting. thank you for helping me stop looking to others for feeling good. thank you for helping me let go. GOD I WANT TO LET GO.

thank you for the better mood. thank you for the relief. thank you for the good day. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for the magick life. thank you for the good news. thank you for the angels and healers. thank you for helping me stay sober. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for helping me get over this fucking hangover.

thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you god for replacing me with you.

thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you for the perfect timing and magick life. thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you for the magick life. thank you for helping me. thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you god for replacing me with you.

am i aware? i am aware of feeling tired and gross. am i aware? i am aware of hte music and the cramps. am i aware? i am aware of worry and anxiety and caring what people think. am i aware? i am aware of braething and blinking and my foot falling asleep. am i aware? i am aware of feeling depressed. am ia ware? i am aware of wanting to control and feeling out of control.

am i aware? i am aware of compulsively checking my phone. am i aware? i am aware of feeling uncomfortable. am i aware? i am aware of the weather inside and out. am i aware? i am aware of feeling frustrated. am i aware? i am aware of feeling so frustrated. am i aware? i am aware of sitting here and watching my hands type. am i aware? i am aware of feeling so depressed. am i aware? i am aware of feeling so bad i know i am pushing things away!

i know i have to flip the switch with thank you!
i have to flip the switch! i have to flip the switch! i have to flip the switch!

thank you! thank you god for replacing me with you! thank you god for replacing me with you! thank you god for replacing me wtih you! thank you god for replacing me with you! thank you! thank you for the love! thank you for the connection! thank you for the relief! thank you for the magick life! thank you god for replacing me with you! thank you for taking away this rage!

thank you for helping me. thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you for helping me surrender. am i aware? i am aware of wanting to let go. am i aware? i am aware of wanting to let go. i surrender. i give up.

Jessica Mullen
Living the magick life.

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