who am iiiii

Jessica Mullen

who am iiiii

Jessica Mullen

who am i who is sitting at this desk, excited to go down the rabbit hole of who am i? who am i who is listening to this beegees song? who am i who feels anxious in the stomach? Who am i who is thinking about whether someone messaged me? Who am i who is sitting here?

who am i who is breathing out? Who am i who is feeling such attachment? who am i who is thinking i have something to lose? Who am i who is looking to another wave for happiness? who am i who is forgetting i am the source?

to be the source = "What can be stronger than your power to observe with detachment?" - mooji

who am i who wants to be affected? who am i who is so nervous? who am i who is WAITING? if you are waiting for something, you need something. who am i who needs something? Who am i who is experiencing lack?

who am i who is breathing in? Who am i who is breathing out? Who am i who is listening to music? who am i who is seeking? Who am i who is reaching reaching reaching for something outside of me before i can feel better?

THANK YOU! Thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you for helping me stay sober today. god i'm in your hands. thank you for replacing me with you. thank you god for replacing me with you. thank you for the magick life. thank you for plenty of money. thank you for client work. thank you for kind words from customers. thank you for the inspiration to make new work. thank you for the magick life. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for helping me surrender. thank you for the perfect timing. thank you for helping me get out of the way. thank you for helping me stay sober today.

who am i who doesn't give a fuck about 6 years sober? who am i who is sitting here?

who am i who is nervously checking my phone?
someone waiting for something to happen before she can feel good

who am i who is thinking i should relax?
someone who wants to get something

who am i who feels incomplete right now?
half a mind, a separation, attention stretched far across the way

who am i who is breathing out?
life

who am i who is breathing in?
it

who am i who is finally slowing down?
presence

who am i who is trying to make peace with what is?
a trained mind

who am i who is listening to music from high school?
someone who is happy to feel something
someone who likes getting mixed with experience
someone who isn't afraid to get hurt or take risks
someone who wants to have fun and be wild

who am i who is breathing in?
who am i who is breathing out?
this
this is it

who am i who is losing focus and spacing out?
the tendrils/storm are relaxing

who am i who is thinking about what someone else is doing?
a child

who am i who is giving up the possibility?
surrendering
awareness
i see now i have to be the source
i have to be complete where i am
being here is enough
i have to believe being here is enough

being here is enough

when i ask who am i and really ask and listen, being here is enough because i am so curious. who the fuck is here?? who the fuck is struggling? who the fuck is it??

who am i who got a glimmer of unease because she thought about a message?
jagged mind edge

who am i who is feeling inspired?
who am i is opening an airway to breathe, to let the flow through

who am i who is thinking about a call?
an ego who wants a boost

who am i who is sitting here? who am i who is watching the lights turn on and off? who am i who is thinking about tea ceremony?

who am i who wants k to pour a cup of coffee?

who am i who is so concerned about a miscommunication? Who am i who is so anxious? Who am i who feels stupid? who am i who feels incomplete? a thought

who am i who is so worried
who am i who is so frustrated
who am i who feels abandoned
who am i who feels unloved
who am i who feels insecure
who am i who feels

Jessica Mullen
Living the magick life.