Watch yourself wonder if you drink too much coffee. Watch yourself feel uncomfortable. Watch yourself worry. WAtch yourself feel crabby. Watch yourself feel hateful. Watch yourself want to separate from your thoughts and emotions. Watch yourself want to escape your thoughts and emotions. Watch yourself want to feel better.

Watch yourself really not give a fuck. Watch yourself feel repulsed.

Watch yourself feel low energy even though it's a full moon. Watch yourself feel so itchy. WAtch yourself want to feel better. WAtch yourself drag your feet. Watch yourself want something that WORKS!!! Watch yourself wish you had a way to feel better in your own head.

Watch yourself want to die to live. Watch yourself feel depressed.

THAT'S NOT ME!

Watch your thoughts
I CAN'T STOP MY THOUGHTS FROM COMING AND MAKING ME FEEL BAD
that's not me!
i am so annoyed!
that's not me!

i have to pee
that's not me
i wonder if the pot's getting low
that's not me
i am disgusted
that's not me
i am full of hate
that's not me
my eye is fucked up
that's not me

i feel so lazy
that's not me
i feel stir crazy
that's not me
my back hurts
that's not me

there's nothing i want to do
that's not me

why am i so irritable
that's not me

i want drugs i want a shortcut i want a flase merkaba
that's not me
i want to feel good about myself i want better music
that's not me
i am so dissatisfied i am so dissappointed
that's not me

i don't want to work out
that's not me
i dont want to do anything
that's not me
i feel uptight and crabby
that's not me
what am i uptight and crabby about?
having to stick to a routine
feeling like it's pointless
feeling like a failure
feeling like i have nothing to look forward to
feeling like i hate my situation
feeling disgusted

that's not me

YOU ARE THE ORIGIN OF THE WAVE YOU GOTTA SEE IT AS ALREADY PERFECT

IT'S SO DARK IN THIS WORLD
that's not me

i just want to eat
that's not me

i'm just so annoyed
that's not me

why am i here
that's not me

I AM NOT MY THOUGHTS
so what! why do i still have them!
that's not me

i'm so annoyed and irritated!
that's not me!

I WANT AN EPIPHANY SO I CAN STOP SUFFERING!
that's not me

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU
that's not me

WHAT IS ME?!?!?!
the watcher
love
awareness

WHY CAN'T I FEEL LOVE??
your mind is confused

i hate
that's not me

i am disgusted
that's not me

i am sad
that's not me

what are you sad about?
the world is unfair and mean and cruel
that's not true
no thought is true

GET THESE THOUGHTS AWAY FROM ME!!!!
that's not me

i've been using false merkabas to get away from my thoughts since i was 16
false merkabas to create the gulf between observer and thought/emotion
now i feel like i have no idea how to get away from my thoughts on my own

counting works i guess
meditating works i guess
but i need something to get me to the gym with a good attitude
i need something to get me to filling these orders with a good attitude
PLEASE HELP ME!!!!
that's not me

i need to do my tapes
i need to go within
THAT"S NOT ME

not even those thoughts are me
they're not true
no thoughts are true

i just want to be coddled and massaged and coached and told what to do
that's not me

i want to hurt the people who hurt the people who hurt
that's not me
i want revenge
that's not me
i want to lash out
that's not me

i wonder if it's the caffeine making me so aggro
that's not me

i want to make good work
that's not me
this moment is the good work

i just KEEP PROJECTING myself OUT OF THIS NOW. WHYYYYY
that's not me

i am so mad and i want other people to make me feel better
that's not me

WHERE DO I GO FROM THERE??
there's nowhere to go

i feel so put upon by the world, so many demands
like i'm so pissed i have to go outside to get my amazon package later that's so fucked up
that's not me

i am so disappointed in myself
that's not me
WHO THE FUCK IS ME?!

the watcher
the observer
the one who watches
loving awareness

why do i feel so crabby before working out
that's not me

what should i do after thinking that's not me?? what's next?

nothing is next. you're already here. you're already in it.

i just want to feel in control
that's not me
control is an illusion, there is no such thing

i am anxious
that's not me

why does appreciation feel so far away
that's not me

why does love feel so far away
that's not me

i just want to feel good about myself
that's not me

there is so much i cannot accept
that's not me

how can i ever let go
accept
say yes

that's not me
there is no question
there is no doubt
i already accept i already say yes to it all

i just want to go under, get dark, self destruct
that's not me

i want a gulf between me and my thoughts
that's not me
my thoughts are tormenting me!
that's not me

WHO IS ME
I AM
this is it
your experience this now that is me
I AM THIS EXPERIENCE
I AM THIS NOW

that's it
this is it

i want constant high octane energy
that's not me
i want to drink a rockstar
that's not me
i just keep wanting more caffeeine, more stimulation
that's not me

WHO IS ME
I AM THIS
I AM IT
I AM NOW
I AM LOVE YEAH LOVE