I am so grateful for the feeling of calm bliss. For a million pillows. For Kelly sending out the postcards. For the podcast. For Kelly's new site. For apples and grapes and bananas and cantaloupe. For laptops in bed. For Kelly doing things while I chill. For doing things in the air.
I am so grateful that the more I let go, the more it flows. I am so grateful that the less I do, the more I achieve.
I am so grateful I am learning to unclench from my habitual negative thoughts. I am so grateful I am uncovering a new level of myself. Peeling away a layer. I am so grateful everything feels different. I am so grateful I feel like I am stripping away parts of my personality that I don't need anymore.
I am so grateful I feel like I'm watching a movie. I feel like source is watching my life through my eyes. My personality is melting away. That which makes me different isn't as important. My life experience makes me unique and that is all. I don't have to try to be different. My path is unique, illuminated, and perfect. I don't need to try.
I am so grateful I am learning that I don't have to try. I don't have to try, I don't have to worry, and I certainly don't have to DO anything.
I am so grateful that my sleep has been so blissful. I have so many revelations. I talk to Kelly while we sleep. I tell her things like "with practice comes mastery." My vibration is so practiced. Everything is speeding up as my actions slow down.
I am so grateful my awareness creates. I am so grateful to be learning unconditional love.
I'm so grateful I am learning to meditate in every moment. I am so grateful that I can stare at the wall or ceiling for minutes and feel like I'm doing something productive.
I'm so grateful to be letting go. I'm so grateful that only my thoughts can block my connection to the flow of well being. I am so grateful I don't have to DO ANYTHING. I can let go. I can let go. I let go. It feels so good, like an orgasm underwater, forever pulsing and twisting and spiraling into new dimensions.
You really can just choose to let everything go. I think the concept used to scare me because it feels so close to the apathy that comes with depression. But it's the opposite. It's knowing that the less I clench, and care, and worry, the more everything flows. It's so weird. The less I care, the more things work out.
Breaking through the emotional plane means living in a state of knowing. I am practicing that state. And with practice comes mastery. It's so easy. I feel so cool. I feel like it's all paying off. And it's paying off in relief. In relaxation. In knowing. I can let go. When I sleep late, I can feel guilty or I can not care and realize it's what I wanted and flow with it.
I know that I'll feel euphoria again. I'll reach a higher high. So why care if I'm not there in this instant? And by letting go of "not feeling euphoric", I am euphoric. I win.
As I slept the day away, I felt so good. Because I finally didn't care. I usually like getting up after 8 hours of sleep. So who cares if I don't do that today? I'll do it again. There is no rush. I don't have to do the same thing again. I don't have to have a routine for the sake of having a routine.
I'm learning to grow like a blade of grass. I'm learning to turn off my insect intellect. I'm learning to practice the feelings I want instead of reaching for thoughts. I'm playing instead of logic-ing. I am choosing to feel good in every moment, because it's a choice and why wouldn't I chose it? It doesn't matter what the world around me looks like. I feel good and that's all that matters.
I am detached. I am relaxed. I am unclenched. I don't care. I let go. Whenever I feel myself clenching back up, I picture vines uncurling around a metal rod. Then I am the solid bliss of the metal rod, and the free flowing vines growing towards the light. They don't have to clench onto each other. I can have both.
I am detached.
I am meditating in every moment. I am in the dualistic mystical state, where I feel the knowing of not thinking while still experiencing thoughts, feelings, and physical reality.
I am moving slow, yet vibrating fast.
I ask, and I let go, trusting.
What is the difference between this state and apathy?
In this state I trust and know. Apathy is a protective feeling when you don't have anything to trust.
They feel similar in the relief they produce. But I live in the "dualistic mystical state" believing in love and source energy taking care of me. I let go because I am cared for. With apathy, I let go because I believe I am not cared for.
I have stepped outside a layer of myself. I am so ecstatic. And I do not feel the need to express this emotion externally. It is a lifestyle, not an anomaly. I don't need to jump up and down about it. Because I practiced so much to get here. Of course I'm here. Just like that, I'm here.
I can relax. I don't have to care. When I don't care, everything I want gets taken care of around me.
I had this feeling when I was 15 and failing Chemistry. My parents threatened all sorts of nonsense, but I was unwavering in my attitude. I straight did not care. I was hollow. I was doing exactly what I wanted and not caring about what anyone else thought.
Eventually I got it together and passed Chemistry, but it was in letting go that the solution came. It definitely came in the form of a new crush in my Chem class. Hahahahahaha.
Let go. Maybe it will make a mess, but probably not. More like you'll stop creating the shitstorm around you and then the universe can bring you the golden pinhead solution.
I am so grateful for my wife. I am so grateful for computers in the bed. I am so grateful I can choose to feel good in every moment. I can choose to listen to myself. My Self.
I am so grateful Kerri and her boyfriend are in town!!! I am so grateful we got to pick them up at the airport and hang out for a while! I am so grateful to see my awesome sister again!
I am so grateful for Kelly rolling out the tacos. I am so grateful to let go. I am so grateful to understand. I am so grateful nothing is urgent. I am so grateful. I am so grateful Kerri is in town. I am so grateful to be listening to Bizzy Bone. I am so grateful to feel so chill. I am so grateful to have collected all my notes. I am so grateful for my car. I am so grateful for tacos. I am so grateful for my legs.
I am so grateful I can let go in every moment. I am so grateful I can banish all negative emotion. I am so grateful that I feel unconditional love when I do so. I am so grateful for the break days from exercise.
I am so grateful for my silk shirts. I am so grateful for my cute clothes. I am so grateful to be surrounded by inspiration and abundance. I am so grateful to be focusing on what I want. I am so grateful to be focusing. I am so grateful to be experimenting with the power of my thoughts.
I am so grateful for flour and tortillas. I am so grateful I can keep writing forever. I am so grateful for the School of Life Design Forum! I am so grateful for all the wonderful members! I am so grateful for new members! I am so grateful for all the brilliant conversations going down! I am so grateful for people who want to work on their sites! I am so grateful for people who want to learn with me! I am so grateful to have a community of people to turn to! I am so grateful the forum is so easy to manage! I am so grateful for the technology that provides the forum!
Wouldn't it be nice to reply to all the posts in the forum? Wouldn't it be nice to write? Wouldn't it be nice to practice letting go more and more today? Wouldn't it be nice to return my emails? Wouldn't it be nice to keep searching for signs of abundance? Wouldn't it be nice to make that clay diorama I want to make? Wouldn't it be nice to keep this calm? Wouldn't it be nice to write all day? Wouldn't it be nice to keep letting go? Wouldn't it be nice to keep saying in every moment, "who cares?" or "let go" or "I love" or "I am so grateful" or "I'm in the flow."
Wouldn't it be nice to live my entire life in flow?
What do I want?
I am aligned with who I really am.
I live my life in flow.
I love unconditionally, meaning I am ok with any outcome. I let go of all attachment to manifestations and outcomes and focus only on the now. I can choose to feel good right now, and so I do. I am practiced. And with practice comes mastery.
What I want to feel today
- Flow (playing AJ for the first time / handbells with music, seeing the fabric of unfolding as love / driving home after an exquisite workout / horses and hummers on the highway / that feeling of complete KNOWING)
- Letting go / relief (tentacles holding on ((to negative thoughts)) until they're all full, sinking! And then letting go, releasing... the relief of realizing you float to the top when you let go of the rocks dragging you down)
- The feeling of helping people get websites! It feels like helping... like passion. Like everything is perfect and in its place. Like I know the way. Like I know.
Today I intend to practice visualizing my tentacles releasing all negative thought, floating around like a squid. My tentacles of focus. When my tentacles of focus aren't holding on to stale desires or negative thoughts, they are free to focus on being the flow, enjoying the flow, basking in the ability to flow, and the ability to direct the flow. My tentacles of focus are my power. And they can join the power that is everything. But if they are clinging, they can't flow with the power. When I let go, I am commanded by the flow and I command the flow at the same time.
I love practicing feelings that I usually use other means to achieve. I love practicing the feeling of flow that exercise gives me! I love that I can feel as good as if I exercised even if I haven't. I love that it's all just a thought, just a feeling.
I love being detached. I love that I have a brand new visual metaphor for thinking about flow and letting go.
When you play, you let go because you need all your tentacles of focus in the game or it won't be fun and you'll suck.
But you can let go without doing something to trick yourself into letting go. Just visualize it. You are a creature with tentacles of focus. You can choose to use those tentacles of focus to flow in the moment and direct the flow. Or you can use your tentacles to cling onto negative thoughts, feelings, and stale desires, sinking to the bottom while all of life flows around you. But when you let go, you shoot to the top! Like letting go of rocks!
11 things I'm excited about today
- Working with the new 'letting go' visual metaphor
- KELLY MADE TACOS!
- Reading The Art of Dreaming again!
- Giving myself permission to practice letting go all day.
- Taco dropoff!
- The house is clean, the laundry is done, Kelly is the BEST!
- KELLY HAS A NEW SITE!!!
- Going with the flow
- Chillin in the forum!
10 things I appreciate about myself
- I am a visionary
- I read
- I listen
- I let go of more every day
- I write
- I am learning to not try
- I make connections
- I am focused
- I am prolific
- I am stripping away the unwanted
Advice from Clair
Clair, how can I feel good right now?
Choose to. Make the choice. Move to a better feeling thought. Let go. Release.
Telling my future
Today I get better at choosing to feel good in each and every moment. I don't need to do anything, go anywhere, or say anything different. I just have to choose. In every moment.
Today's affirmations / thoughts to bookmark
- Let go.
- Go with the flow.