Playing the looking-at-people-with-love game


Playing the looking-at-people-with-love game

thanks herwordskill!

In The Power of Intention, Wayne Dyer tells a story about convincing an airline employee to allow him to take an extra bag on his flight. He ends the interaction with the extra bag on board and a ticket upgraded to first class. The way he convinced the woman was by looking at her with love.

Everyone wants to feel loved. When you make someone feel loved, they want to do nice things for you. Choosing to feel unconditional love for those around you is neither selfish nor selfless; it simply produces a symbiotic relationship where both parties benefit.

I like to think of it as a game. Dyer takes a similar approach–by the end of the interaction with a surly someone, his goal is to have her eating out of his hand.

How to play

  1. The game is always on!
    Sometimes the hardest part is remembering to play. Practice whenever you can. Take any mundane task, like returning an item to a store, and turn it into a challenge. How much can you gain from this situation?
  2. Use eye contact.
    Your eyes are your most powerful tool. When you gaze into someone's eyes, think about sending them love. You don't have to over-complicate it, just think "I'm sending you love." Practice on yourself in the mirror. It feels good.
  3. Smile.
    Eye contact PLUS smiling? Talk about disarming! Smiling says "I'm on your side. I'm having a good time. I want to be friends. I'm human too. Let's work this out."
  4. Shoot EXTRA love at douchebags.
    Get over your pride and be compassionate towards people you feel don't deserve it. First of all, they are only reflecting something that's active in YOUR vibration. Your thoughts did create this situation. Second, winning over a so-called d-bag earns you extra points because it's a harder challenge. And once you clean up your negative vibration about a situation, you never have to deal with it again.

    For example, picture waiting in line to renew your driver's license. If your expectation is that the process will be arduous and unpleasant, then it probably will be. But if you choose to interact with love, your experience will go very smoothly. Then the next time you go to the DMV you will have a positive expectation, ensuring a more pleasant experience each successive visit.

Play to win!

When you are successful at this game, you'll know it. You'll get everything you ask for. People will bend over backwards to do you favors. Try playing the next time you go to the supermarket or gas station. Every experience can have surprisingly fun results with the right attitude!

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Jessica Mullen
Living the magick life.
  • meaghan

    This sounds slightly like “the secret”.
    secret’s out, bitches.

  • jessica mullen

    lol how did you know?!

  • Shiloh

    I visited your site yesterday from Galadarling and I was blown away! I sat for the rest of the day (at work) and just read as much as I could! I went home right away and subscribed to your podcast and started to watch them last night. You guys are so cute! I decided that this morning rather than keeping my internal thoughts in my head I would speak them out loud so while I showered I said my I am grateful, I intend, and wouldn’t it be nice! At first it was a little weird but after awhile I was almost about to cry! So for this whole day I have been saying I intend..I intend and it works! I have had soo many complements and my boss even took me out for lunch and HE paid!!!!!! I will continue this everyday. Thank You for everything keep up the GREAT WORK!!!!!!

  • jessica mullen

    Hi Shiloh!
    Yay thank you for checking out the podcast! It’s been a weird and fun project for us. I am SO HAPPY to hear about things going your way. It is so exciting to find out how easy it is to feel good! Thanks for the kind words :]

  • Sarah

    “I like to think of it as a game. Dyer takes a similar approach–by the end of the interaction with a surly someone, his goal is to have her eating out of his hand.” Umm wow that sounds super manipulative. This is almost like subtle hypnosis, & that’s selfish. I do this anyway, sending out love; but never to expect something in return. People’s minds should not be played with.

  • jessica mullen

    Everything should be played with :]

  • sarah perry

    this also works on tasks and experiences!! I have been working on this design problem for what seems like ages, and realized that the reason nothing was working out was because I was looking at it with disdain! I re-visited the original sketch and looked at it with love instead and everything sort of shifted and clicked into place! SO COOOL!!!

  • jessica mullen

    Sarah, THANK YOU for that idea! Love is so powerful! I’m so trying that tomorrow…

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